Beware of these women!
NOTE: This is NOT an article I wrote (Jay, Weekenddating). It is relevant to dating and is listed for you to voice your opinion
This Young Woman Scored $1,200 A Month In Fancy Dinners Using Match.com
Madeleine Scinto|Nov. 29, 2011, 3:47 PM
A young New Yorker we’ll call Minerva McGonagall* was tired of dipping into her savings to keep up with her Manhattan lifestyle.
Her $45k salary was not enough and she needed at least an extra $500 a month and sometimes $1,000 to pay her credit card bills and afford her $1,475 a month apartment in Murray Hill.
Then she discovered Match.com– the perfect site for a broke 23-year-old.
“Before I barely had enough money to pay for food,†said McGonagall. “After using Match.com I found I wasn’t going into debt anymore.â€
McGonagall started eating out five nights a week using a rotation of different guys she met through the dating site. McGonagall kept things simple—no more than five dates with the same guy.
The investment banker types were thrilled to woo her with extraordinary restaurants like the underground taqueria La Esquina and a Japanese restaurant, Megu, in Tribeca. One guy even took her to a champagne bar and purchased a $200 bottle.
McGonagall went from easily spending $500 a month on dinners alone to having someone else dole out an average of $60-plus per night. She also stopped eating lunch and opted for a light breakfast to save even more.
According to our calculations, Sporty made over $1,200 a month.
Match.com does require a $50 monthly subscription, but the dates more than made up for the entry price.
“I mean, a guy buys me three drinks at $15 a pop and that right there made up for my Match fee,†said McGonagall.
McGonagall’s roommates played the money-saving game as well. In fact, McGonagall first learned about online dating after watching one of her roommates go on extravagant outings every night.
Two weeks later, McGonagall and her other roommate joined.
“We made ground rules,†said McGonagall.
One of them called for making spreadsheets about each guy who took them out for their drinks and/or meals. It included names, photos and details from their Match.com accounts.
The girls also let each other know where they were going for the night. And they never let guys pick them up at their apartment and instead met up at a public location.
After awhile at their escapades, they soon learned how prevalent the online dating scene had become in New York City. McGonagall commonly ran into people she recognized from the site, and discovered that others using Match.com averaged at least ten dates before meeting her.
It’s no surprise considering New York City ranks as the number one online dating city, according to a survey of singles by SNAP Interactive, a social media site. But as popular as online dating had become, and as much of a great saving tactic it was, McGonagall eventually tired of the scene.
“It was exhausting,” she said. “I needed my sleep and I was done playing the game.”
McGonagall seems to have retired for good—she currently has a boyfriend.
Now you know why guys would want to meet up for a drink first!
Wow! I certainly wanted to get my money’s worth when I did match.com, but that’s really going overboard. Rest assured, not all women see a guy as a meal ticket.
Seriously who are these girls that are able to have guys buy them dinner? Most of the guys I have met want a quick cup of coffee and then think we owe them sex!
I’ve been dating for quite some time ( not bragging just haven’t found the right someone as most haven’t) and have found woman have it made is this department because of how we are raised (I’m not blaming anyone), (Caution) we are the aggressors (chasers) and they are the aggress-ee’s (the chased) this makes if easy to fall into the trap already stated and created by our society’s rules “we are supposed to pay”. Anyone who wants dinner on the first date to me is a red flag, I have fallen for that twice in my dating life, never again, now just a cup of coffee or a drink and WE, not I or HER will take it from there, lets face it its not easy out there and our economy doesn’t help male or female, and of course not all woman are looking for a hand out, just as not all men are expecting sex for a drink or dinner. Bottom line is we are all responsible for our behavior’s and some people need to grow up, no one wants to feel used.
I think it’s horrible that these women are taking advantage of men like this. I’ve never agreed to go out with someone unless I thought there might be some real potential connection, and I imagine that unscrupulous women like these are the minority. I think it’s fine to ask someone out for only coffee or a drink if you’ve never met her before. If you suggest that the second time, however — and I did have this happen to me following having met someone at a Speeddating event — it gives the impression that you’re not someone who really wants to get out and do very much — not someone I’m looking for, anyway. I think an activity and/or dinner is more appropriate for the second + date.
This article seems to bash women. How about the men? They play games too. I had a lunch date, which HE wanted at a local Olive Garden. After we ordered, he showed me his empty wallet and said he FORGOT to go to the bank. So I got stuck paying the bill for the BOTH of us. I always offer to pay half the check and/or leave the tip. Bottom line, Dont bash women on this subject. Men play the same game…
Jay, I can’t believe that you actually put this on your website. You are a dating service that is suppose to be HELPING men and women find a special connection. This article proves that you are not. You are looking at this one-sided. I am sure there are women out there that do this but the men are no better. There are plenty of men who are also takers and some are at your speed dating events. By you clearly stating that only women do this, you are going to lose many many women in your dating service. I myself will have to think twice before I attend another event of yours. Taking sides is NOT a very responsible or intelligent thing to do if you are a dating service. You need to retract this article or rewrite it to make everyone aware that this sort of situation can happen. I also strongly suggest that you APOLOGIZE to all the women on your site. I know I want one. To Nice Guy: I am glad you,a man, are able to see that there are two sides to everything. I too, have dated for quite some time and have also had my fair share of situations. You are correct that people are responsible for their behavior and that no one wants to feel or be used. Good Luck out there.
Hi Nice Girl.
This is NOT an article that I wrote. As noted above, it was on Business Insider and the authors name is noted above. So I am not sure it is appropriate for me to rewrite someone else’s work. Comment on someone else’s work YES, but I should not edit someone else because it may be controversial.
The article was not meant to offend you or anyone out there, so I am certainly sorry if it did. It is relevant to the topic of dating, so it was put up to start a discussion and let people voice their opinion.
If you want my personal opinion, I will give it to you. Personally speaking, I do not believe the article reflects the majority of women. I also personally agree that it goes both ways. There are plenty of men as you say that are takers as well.
That being said, I am also a human being, and this business is personal, so I do raise my own opinion at times. The women who did this purely for a meal ticket pissed me off big time. When I hear stories of men using women, it also annoys the heck out of me.
Thanks for writing in and feel free to give a call to discuss your concerns further at 718-757-6933.
Jay
Jay, I knew that you did no write this. But, by posting this you obviously seem to agree. What you should have done is you should have found a newsletter stating that men also use women. By justing posting a mans view, you left all women thinking that you have no respect and regard for your female clients. I hope to see an article soon regarding men as the users.
Thanks for answering.
Nice Girl,
Perhaps I need to preface any controversial post with something like this article does not reflect my own personal opinions. I post many things that I do agree with. They are posted because it is relevant to dating. Some past articles discussed issues with the guys behavior to which some have written me.
Again, just for the record, if an article has relevance to dating, I may post it whether I agree or not with the content. Two sides to every story. I want to create an open forum where people can discuss issues relavant to dating.
When I have a personal opinion, I will chime in and say it is coming from me.
Thanks
I’d like to chime in here and state that there are definitely 2 sides to every story. I recently attended a dating event and ran into a man that I had seen on and off at different events and through different services over the years. Like other people posted above, I, and this man, have not been able to find someone whom we can honestly say we connect with. Short-term relationships have been the norm. However, when I asked what has been happening that he can’t meet someone, he replied that ‘he has hurt women and he has BEEN hurt by women, but it has not discouraged him from getting out there and trying to find that connection. The point is, he has realized his wrong-doings but it has been evened out by the wrong-doings of some of the women he has dated. It is NOT one-sided. It is NOT one sex that is using the other. BOTH sexes engage in this behavior. Nice guy summed it up right: Bottom line is we are all responsible for our behaviors and some people need to grow up, no one wants to feel used.