Texting vs. Calling
So what is it about texting someone vs. calling?
At our speed pool event about a month ago, a married couple seemed very intrigued by what was going on. The woman said she had a single sister and wanted to let her know about the events. Then she asked about my status and when I told her that I was single, she asked if I would be interested in talking to her sister.
In the past.. No chance in He%%.. Been there done that with the blind date thing and I hate getting caught in a potentially awkward situation. I’m a guy, and I am visual. Hey looks are not everything, but there has to be some attraction.
However the new me, is trying to keep an open mind and change my tune.  I said “Sure, I will talk to her.” I figured the worst thing that can happen is that I will let her know about the events if we do not hit it off.” The woman gave me her sisters number and although I did not know it at the time, was trying to snap secret pictures of me to email to her sister. Wow,, got to love technology. (Pics didn’t come out, it was too dark)
So I called a few days later and to my surprise had a great conversation. We spoke for about a half hour. Since I do not follow the three day rule, I called a day or two later and left a message.
No phone call back. Hmm, ok, maybe she is one of these old fashioned women, so I waited 4 or 5 days, and again got her voice mail. I left a message and once again no phone call back.
Now I’m pissed, and said ok, 3 strikes your out, and about a week later, I sent her a text message.  Boom, within 5 minutes she replied, asking how I was, blah blah blah. Went back and forth on text for a bit.
Ok, this is getting a little long, so I will cut it here and fill you in next time as to what happened. In the meantime check out a funny skit about the whole text message thingy.
Warning:Â If you can not appreciate adult humor, skip this video.
O.K., I for one cannot stand the ritual of ‘texting’ as a means of communicating with dates, especially in the beginning when you really don’t know each other. I’m o.k. with a text to say, “Hi! Will you be around later so that we can chat on the phone?”, and with an actual phone call that follows! I know that nerves come into play, but, really, what happened to calling someone (men) and then returning the phone call (women)???? Jay, you did the right thing by calling her, and as you saw, there was a great conversation that followed. Unfortunately, she did not do right by you, and I don’t blame you for being pissed. Maybe she was nervous? Possible. Maybe she was just busy and didn’t have a chance to return the calls and text messaging was quick and easy? Probably. For your sake, Jay, I hope the text messaging opened up the communication lines and led to an actual date!
I can honestly say that I have done the text rather than call scenario. Texting is my way of chickening out. I wont return a phone call if I am not really interested, but I will return a text because I feel bad. Sound horrible? Yes, I know it does…but its the truth!
Hey Steph, I agree entirely, and normally I also agree that if someone texts but doesn’t call, it means they are not really interested, but…..
I will let you know the end result in my next post.
Jay
Texting should be the “in between” communication, not the real communication. I’ll sometimes respond to a vmail with a text, “Got your message, I’ll call you around 8” or something like that. If I’m meeting someone at a restaurant or a bar, I’ll text when I get there, “Just arrived, are you inside?” Not really a fan of using texting as conversation.
Texting is very lame and I find it’s the trend…and a cowardly way of communicating back. Men who are either in relationships–and unable to have a conversation because their time is limited will usually text. The same goes for women, who are not necessarily busy–but have too much going on. Yes…it’s the easy way out–but getting to know someone should not be about what is easy. And if someone has such limited time that they have to text–they don’t have room for anyone in their lives. Texting in general is time-consuming, impersonal and thoughtless…unless you are texting to confirm plans and are unable to speak due to work, or you already know each other–and just want to firm up details, such where, when and how? That simple.
Technology has created such an impersonal platform for dating now. Such a shame. If a phone call is “too much work”–for either a man or woman–don’t bother wasting your valuable time with someone like that.
Texting can be to impersonal since you are unable to gauge a persons reaction. I only use texting for short bursts of conversation when I am unable to have a phone conversation.
Personally I feel that the girl was rude for not at least offering some kind of excuse