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From tesh.com

People Are Trying To Impress Their Dates With The Food They Eat

A new study from Cornell University says that women’s dating habits haven’t changed in decades! Women are still choosing to nibble on vegetables when they’re on a date, because they believe it makes them look more feminine and attractive. It turns out, the opposite is true. When you order a salad and only pick at it, the guy will feel like a slob when he’s plowing through his dinner. In fact, in a study conducted by the University of Toronto, men rated women of normal weight, who ate large meals, as more desirable than those who ate like birds. Why? Because men form an impression about you based on what you eat. If you seem relaxed and like you’re enjoying your food, you date will perceive you as more attractive, pleasant and open.

According to the study, men, on the other hand, have changed their dating behavior. Now they’re going for the pasta over the steak, and this is the right move. When a guy plops down and eats something fatty, a girl can’t help but wonder if he eats that way all the time. It crosses her mind that he’ll probably pack on weight, clog his arteries and die early. One thing both sexes agree on: The foods to stay away from. According to the study, everyone said no to garlic and onions, beans, and cabbage.

So you’ve carefully ordered your dinner, making sure that there’s nothing stinky, or messy, or unattractive to eat. Now, how can you tell if the date’s going well? Here’s what you do, according to Dr. David Givens, author of the book Love Signals: Offer her a bite of your entrée. Dr. Givens says, if she takes the fork from your hand and slides the food onto her own plate that’s bad news. She’s closed off to you. If she takes your fork and takes a bite, good sign. If she lets you feed her, better sign. If she takes a bite and then offers you a bite of her food, bonus points – date #2 is in the bag.

from Tesh.com

The Top Three Dating Deal Breakers

Ladies, if you’re in the dating scene, it isn’t just about knowing what to look for in a mate. It’s also about knowing what to stay away from. So we turned to CNN dating columnist, Audrey Irvine, to find out the top three guys that are total dating deal-breakers.

First deal-breaker is the one-upper. This is the guy who always has to top everything you’ve done or every story you tell. If you ran a half marathon, he just finished his third triathlon. If you’re working on your master’s, he’s got a PhD. Irvine says a man like this can get exhausting. His experiences will always be bigger and better than yours. So before you consider seriously dating a one-upper, think about how you’ll feel when you’re celebrating a big work promotion, and he’s already figuring out how to top you!

Next dating deal-breaker is the back-in-the-day Guy. He’s the guy who’s always talking about the touchdown pass he threw in high-school, or reliving moments from his frat-house days. Irvine says there’s nostalgia, and then there’s “get over it already.” So if those memories are ten years old or older, he’s a dealbreaker!

The final dating deal-breaker: The perfect-in-public Guy. The PIP is great when you’re out to dinner with friends, or at the company Christmas party, but he never turns it off. He always has to be the funniest, loudest person in the room, even when it’s just the two of you watching TV. The PIP is masking some deep insecurities, which is why he spends so much time hiding behind his larger-than-life personality. Unless you’re a therapist with some time on your hands leave the PIP for the next girl!

Looking for Long Island New Years Eve ?

Lets talk about some dealbreakers that can make it or break it as far as getting a date, or getting a second date. 

Some of these are my own dealbreakers, but most come from my numerous discussions with you.  Please add your own and lets get the opposite sex educated.

Dealbreakers I have heard from women about men

1. Guy has bad breathe.– Bad breathe equals no date, no kiss, or no second date. 
2. Guy is cheap- Wants to go dutch at Starbucks
3. Guy looks like he just rolled out of bed and made no effort to get groomed for the date
4. Guy is rude to the waitstaff at dinner
5. Guy wears sneakers to a speed dating event
6. Body odor issues
7. Poor eye contact
8. Talks only about himself, not showing any interest in the woman
9. Has a very small piece of equipment with respect to the male Anatomy
10. Too much, too soon, too fast.. Guy is talking about marriage and exclusivity after the second date.
11. Looking for sex way too quickly

What else?

DealBreakers I have heard from Men about Women

1. Smokers– Nasty Nasty Nasty.. Did I mention Nasty?
2. Not thanking the guy at the end of the date for paying for dinner or whatever
3. Not at least making the fake attempt to pull out the wallet to pay for dinner or drinks.. Most (not all guys) are not really expecting you to pay, but that fake attempt or at least a thank you is nice.
4. Height-  Most (not all) guys are looking for a woman who is shorter than they are.
5. Age-  Guys are getting better on this one, but it is still a frequent comment I get as far as dealbreakers
6. Flakey- She is unreliable and cancels dates at the last minute.
7. No career ambition-  Wants and expects the man to be the breadwinner

What else?

From Tesh.com

Does Your Budding Romance Have a Future?

So, you’re dating someone you’re totally crazy about! Is this intense attraction you feel for them love – or temporary infatuation? Here’s how to tell whether your budding romance has a future. Ask yourself these questions from eHarmony online.

How much do you know about the other person’s life? Sure, you may know what they do for a living and where they live, but have you met this person’s friends, spent entire weekends together, or been included in each other’s daily lives? The best way to know if it’s love or infatuation is take an honest look at how unified the two of you are. This doesn’t mean just the level at which you’re opening up, but how much your partner is letting you in, too.

Is the feeling mutual? Although YOU may feel that things are going well, your partner may have other ideas. If only one of you is interested in a future together, it’s better to know that before you get in too deep. So, ask. This is a conversation for the two-month mark or so. It’s important to know where you stand as soon as possible so that you can proceed with caution or commitment.

Do you share common life goals, dreams and ambitions? When the newness wears off, you probably won’t want to invest your time, energy and intimacy with someone who doesn’t share a similar vision of the future. So, before you get too involved, discuss things such as your long-term goals and how you feel about kids. Also, find out where each of your careers rank on your lists of priorities, and how similar your ethics and morals are. Yes, this conversation will probably be uncomfortable, but it’s an important discussion to have about three or four months into a budding relationship. Why? Because it cuts down on wasted time and hurt feelings.

 
New Years Eve Long Island

From http://www.tesh.com/

Is He Into You or Not?

Ladies, here are the signs according to science and relationship expert Dr. Kevin Hogan, author of Irresistible Attraction.

If he’s into you, he’ll fuss over you. Let’s say you’re in mid-conversation and he reaches over to brush a piece of fuzz off your sweater – he isn’t focusing on your imperfections, he’s showing interest. Dr. Hogan calls it “lint picking.” Animals do it – they’ll swat bugs away from their mate, or groom each other. It’s an excuse to enter into your personal space.

Another sign of attraction? He’ll look slightly shocked. If you pay close attention, you’ll see a man slightly lift his eyebrows and look surprised while talking to you. It’s a subconscious reaction when a man sees something he likes.

Another clue that he’s into you? He’ll turn his chest toward you. According to anthropologist and relationship expert Helen Fisher, author of Why Him? Why Her? – when a man points his chest in your direction, you’re on his radar. She says it’s the same as when a gorilla pounds his chest and roars – it’s a way to command attention. For a man, it means “Look at me! I’m important!”

One last sign that he’s into you: He’ll slouch his shoulders. Once you’re engaged in conversation, he’ll ditch the gorilla act and slump forward, rounding his shoulders to appear smaller. Dr. Hogan says slouching is a way for a man to seem more approachable and less threatening to a woman. His posture is sending the signal, “I’m on your level, let’s connect.” Anthropologist Dr. Fisher says his relaxed posture means he’s comfortable in your presence.

So let’s review: If he picks lint off your sweater, raises his eyebrows, turns his gorilla chest toward you, and then slouches once you’re talking – he’s into you.

From http://www.tesh.com/

What Is Your Guy Really Saying?

Ladies, it’s time to translate a few “man-phrases” for you. Like, what a man means when he says, “I’ll call you.” The translations come from Steve Santagati, a relationship expert from “The Today Show”:

Okay, so when a guy says, “I’ll call you” – what he means is “I may call you.” Santagati says a man will definitely ask for your phone number if he likes you, but he could also just be looking for quick way to end the conversation. So, don’t count on getting a call.

If a man says, “I’ve been busy lately,” it could mean two things. Santagati says, if you’ve been dating less than six months, it means, “I’ve lost interest in you.” If you’ve been dating longer, it means, “I like you, but I also need to focus on other things.” Bottom line: You may be a big part of his life – but he’s also got a job, friends and family, too.

When a guy says, “I need some space,” what does he mean? “This relationship is moving too fast.” It could also mean: “It’s over.” Santagati recommends asking if he still wants to date you. If he says “yes,” turn back the clock to early courtship behavior where he calls to ask you out on dates. Also, spend time with your friends, take classes, and pursue your own interests. That way, you’re not so dependent on him.

When a man says, “I love spending time with you.” He actually means, “I love you – I think.” Santagati says that just saying the word “love” may be his ways of dipping his toe in the “I love you” waters to see how it feels. So, don’t make a big deal out of it.

Finally, when a guy says, “I want this to last forever” he means, “I’m really happy right now.” Santagati says that if you’re wondering if your relationship has a future, a man’s behavior is more important than his words. For example, is he physically affectionate? Does he remember the things that are important to you? Is he supportive when you need it? If you can answer “yes” to all those questions, your relationship is doing just fine.

Long Island Speed Dating

From www.Tesh.com

Love at First Sight Really Does Exist

Is there really such a thing as love at first sight? A lot of scientists say, “Yes.” That it’s definitely possible to realize you’ve met “The One” within three minutes of laying eyes on them. Dr. Helen Fisher is the author of Why Him? Why Her? She says that from the beginning of time, humans have been designed to instantly sort out friends from enemies. In ancient times, it helped keep people safe. Today, we use those same skills to size up a potential partner. Here are the facts on attraction:
First, it takes less than one second to decide whether you find someone physically attractive, which means, your brain immediately eliminates anyone who’s too short or too tall for you, too old or too young, or too scruffy or too well-scrubbed for your taste.

Next, if they fit your general concept of “The One,” you focus on their voice. Once again, you decide whether you like it in a matter of seconds. So, what are we looking for in a voice? Women think men with full, deep voices are better looking than they really are. Men are more attracted to women with higher-pitched voices, or who sound breathy, like Marilyn Monroe. Studies show that men and women think people who speak faster are smarter.

What else happens in the first three minutes of meeting someone? You judge their words. Studies show that we tend to like people who use the same kinds of words we do, whether they’re short words or long words, descriptive words, or scientific words, formal words or slang. Dr. Fisher says you’re more likely to fall in love at first sight if your first conversation turns to something you think is important – like music, kids, or work – and you’re both totally in agreement.

Of course, love at first sight doesn’t happen to everyone. Researchers at Ben-Gurion University in Israel found that only 11% of people say their long-term relationships started at “hello.” However, if you like someone even slightly, the more similar you are – as far as your values, education, background and morals – the more the attraction will grow over time. Whether it’s love at first sight – or love in hindsight – those first three minutes can make or break your romance.

Our first couples reunion brought back 18 people (9 couples) who have either gotten married or are in long term committed relationships as a result of our weekenddating.com events.
It was held on November 1st at Alletos Restaurant in Lindenhurst (218 Montauk HwyLindenhurst, NY 11757, 631- 226-9205) Great food, great service. Ask for the owner Joe if you go on a date there and mention WeekendDating so he can try to seat you where our reunion couples were.   We know of at least 30 marriages, many engagements and many many more happy couples who are together!

Our next Couples Reunion event will be at the Brokerage Comedy Club in May 2009..  If you met your special someone at our events, I would love to have you there!  Email Jay– Info@WeekendDating.com

Dear Jay,

Can you please post this situation for your readers.

I recently met a woman at an event and she was absolutely gorgeous. This is the type of woman that gets hit on constantly and has many choices. We were a match, and I emailed her the next day. Four days later, she got back to me and said that she did not check her email much, however really enjoyed hearing from me. I replied back and again, another 3 or 4 days later, she got back to me.

In the next email, I asked for her phone number and she replied almost immediately with a nice note and the phone number. I called a few days later, and no return call. I said to myself, what the heck and called her again the following week. While I was leaving her a voice message, my call waiting kicked in and it was her.

She said that she wanted to get back to me, but couldn’t really talk because she was doing something with her daughter and asked if she could call me back later that night. I said it was not a problem, and that I looked forward to speaking with her later that night.

More than a week has gone by and no response. I say to myself, why the hell did she return my call in the first place (and yes, she swears she knew it was me who called), if she had no interest?

I asked my friend Monica about this and mentioned that I was going to send one last email. Monica scolded me and said that under no circumstances should I contact her again. “If she is interested, she will call you”……

and…..

“If she does call you and leaves a voice message, DO NOT CALL HER BACK. If she gets you on the phone, say “it was nice hearing from you, but I am in the middle of something and have to go.” Monica said DO NOT tell her that you will call her back. Monica said that when you don’t call her back, it will drive her crazy and say why isnt this guy up my behind like the rest and that she will call you back.

This counter intuitive game playing stuff is driving me nuts. Does it ever end?