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From www.Tesh.com
Despite the tight economy, more and more people are flocking to online dating sites. According to Whitney Casey, who wrote the book The Man Plan, men still don’t know how to talk to women online. So, here are Casey’s tips for the right way to reply to a woman’s profile, courtesy of Match.com:
Follow her lead. If a woman’s profile is long, thoughtful and uses proper English, don’t reply with slang, insults, or text-message shorthand. Make sure you spell-check! For example, if she says she’s a Cubs fan and plays in a dodge-ball league, don’t say: “The Cubs are losers. But that’d be a great way to meet someone – hit ‘em in the face with a dodge-ball!” Bottom line: If you don’t make a good impression in writing, you won’t get the chance to make a good impression in person.

Ask questions, and share information about yourself. It may sound simple, but Casey says most men don’t make conversation – they just make contact. So, ask at least three questions in your first email, and answer the questions yourself. For example: “How long have you lived in New York? I’ve been here for six years, and I love Greenwich Village”.   

Personalize your reply. Skip generic comments like, “I’m sure you hear this all the time – but you’ve got a smile that matches your perky personality.” Why? Because you could’ve sent that email to anybody, and she’ll think you didn’t bother to actually read her profile.  

Finally, take it slowly. In other words, don’t say, “Hi, I’m single, fun, and ready to be the man in your life.” Women find pushy and overly-enthusiastic guys downright creepy. The smart move: Trade at least three emails and a phone call, and then ask to meet. After all, if you can’t make a good impression via email, you probably won’t click in person, either.

Hi,

I think this will help alot of women. Ask men this, after they meet a women how long do they wait to contact her and why? Then after the first date how long do they wait. Would it bother them if women call them after a first date to make plans to go out.

Ali

As I was lying by the lake at Club Getaway this past weekend, I heard a roar and then the scream “SPEEDOS”, “SPEEDOS”, “SPEEDOS.”

He probably had no idea that he was the talk of the town. How could he know? If nobody was nice enough to tell him, he could go on and on, not having a clue. Guys, in case you have any old pairs of speedo’s that you are tempted to wear, you may want to throw them out, or use them as a rag. Although there may be a few ladies that like them, the consensus this past weekend, is that the speedos have got to go.

So lets talk about some other no no’s, fashion or otherwise that the opposite sex should know about. Even if you think it should be totally obvious, say it anyway. This poor guy who got the nickname “speedos” for the weekend, had no clue, so lets help each other out and spell out even the “obvious.”

Please share your thoughts in the blog.

Ladies,
Is a guy with manicured nails a turn on, turn off, or makes no difference at all?
I am still a little stuck being traditional in certain areas (eg women wear earrings and get manicures, spend more; time getting ready than guys etc). The Metrosexual phase just never did it for me.

That being said, I have heard some guys talk about getting their nails done, and have had some female friends (some reading this right now), saying how great it feels to get a manicure and that I should get one. Since I have never had one in my life, I was a little curious to try it. Over time, I would pass by the salon, look in and see a bunch of women getting nails done, and could not get myself to go in.

Well a few days ago, I passed by the salon and it was completely empty, so I went in.
The woman was nice and tried to make small talk, although I really couldn’t understand her. (She kept saying Korea, my country, mucho money, dating, and get married. I think she either wanted me to go to Korea to start a speed dating company or wanted to get married).

Twenty minutes later she finished my nails and told me to sit in another chair. Next thing I knew, she was doing my feet. Another woman came out of the back room and and then Mr. Kim entered the salon with a bag full of products. I think he was trying to sell me some imported cologne, but can not be 100% sure. The three of them started talking and laughing for the next 10 minutes until I was finished. This made me feel uncomfortable since I did not know what they were saying.

Have you seen the episode from Seinfeld where Elaine gets her nails done and suspects people are talking about her?

After I left the salon, I noticed my nails and toenails were shining in the sun. This just didn’t seem right to me. My nails looked good, but guys are not supposed to have shiny nails!! Ok, Ok, I know I am in that traditional mindset, but I didn’t like it. I spent the next two days trying to get rid of the shine with nail polish remover after asking female friends for help, but it didn’t work. Finally after the advice of my dentist (a guy with daughters), I bought the right stuff (special pads) to kill the shine.

So, my days for now of getting manicures/pedicures are over. I am curious though as to whether women find a guy with shiny manicured nails attractive, and then maybe I would reconsider.

Much thanks

Jay

There are two types of protection:

First off, lets talk about your screen name. If you are using your full name as part of your email address (example- Joan.Smith@yahoo.com), please consider making up a separate email address when attending singles events. There is no need to give out more information than is necessary when first meeting someone.

Second area of protection is yep, you guessed it, Sex. I was talking to a male friend (we will call him Bob) a about a woman he met on something called Tagged. She was from Arizona and Bob lives in Brooklyn, and he flew out to stay with her for a week. When I asked Bob how the trip went, he said “It was ok, she thought I was too feminine for her, and it looks like it will just be a friend thing.”

So asked Bob where he stayed when he was in Arizona, and he said “I stayed at her house. She had a small apartment so I slept in the same bed with her.” Hmm, so of course I needed to ask if anything happened and he said “Yes, we had sex. It wasn’t very good because I was nervous.”

Bob was a little down because things didn’t work out with this gal, so I tried to cheer him up and said, “hey, no biggie. Look at it as a vacation. You got to see a new town, meet some new people, and had some “fun”…As long as you were safe, it’s all good.” He responded that “nope, I wasn’t safe. she is clean. She has two kids and her place was immaculate. I met her mom, when I was there.”

I said “Bob, wtf is wrong with you? She is clean because she has two kids and you met her mother and her place is immaculate!! What the heck does that mean. How do you didn’t get a disease? And how do you know you did not get her pregnant?” Bob responded “she told me she had her tubes tied.”
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Hey, I am no saint (although I am told that I look like one), but guys, just think with the right head before you do something and be safe. For all we know, Bob could not only have a nice new disease, but he could be a daddy soon, and doesn’t even know it.

The last time I had spoken with Jennifer, she told me she had been on a few dates with a guy she had recently met. I said “hey Jennifer, how are things going with the guy you told me about”? Her response was:

“I haven’t spoken to him since the last date. It is so annoying. If he wasn’t interested, I wish he would have just told me, instead of just disappearing and never contacting me again.”
Yep, I admit it, I have done the same thing. Gone out on a few dates with someone and when their was no chemistry, just never called again. But what is the right way, or is their a right way (protocol) to handle it. If you have been dating for a while, then yes, I think their needs to be contact to let the other person know that it is not going anywhere.

But what about if you have dated 3 times or less and are not interested? Do you just not contact the person at all, let them know by email or text, or pick up the phone and tell them. Hey, the right thing to do is the phone, but many of us do not like the confrontation approach.

I received the following recently:
Dear Jay,

I am wondering if any of your readers have faced a similar situation. I had gotten involved with a woman and everything was great. About six months into the relationship I found out that this gal had serious financial problems and was going to file for bankruptcy. From that point on, she started asking for me to put a lot of her personal living expense items (e.g. telephone, credit cards) in my name.

This started to cause a significant strain on our relationship and we are no longer together. I am sure I could have avoided this heart ache, had I known towards the beginning about her serious financial situation. It may have deterred me from getting involved.

At what point is it feasible to ask someone about their financial status?

Thank you,
John

So what do you all think about this? Comment in the blog

I was listening to Howard Stern a while back and heard a commercial for the ManGroomer. I have never had an issue with back hair, but then one day saw a little something where it didn’t belong and decided to pick up the ManGroomer.

I had also heard a lot of female friends comment that back hair was a major turnoff, so I tend to make sure things are not growing where they do not belong.

So I recently became friends with another gal and the topic of body hair came up at a singles comedy event at the Brokerage. She said “As long as his private area is shaved, he could have back hair, nose hair, chest hair, or any other hair for that matter.” Other female friends have recently said the same thing, (not about the privates), but that back hair is not really a turn off anymore.

So what do YOU think about back hair? or any type of hair for that matter?
Comment in the blog