What Women Want- #3, #2, #1
From askmen.com
Sense of humor
A good sense of humor is one of the qualities women almost always mention when listing off the things they look for in a man. We all know how much more fun funny people are than dull, grumpy people. Now this does not mean you need to be “the life of the party.†Women typically don’t gravitate toward drunken buffoons. A good sense of humor just means you know how to tell and take a joke.
2
Ambition
Men too often think that all women care about is money, but that’s nonsense. Sure it may be true of some women, just as it’s true of some men, but women aren’t characteristically attracted to rich guys. The reason women gravitate toward men with successful careers isn’t because of the size of their paychecks, but rather because their success at work is indicative of certain attractive personality traits: commitment, discipline, strong work ethic — all of which are things that will likely make a guy a good partner.
1
Confidence
As you’ve read over this list of the top 10 things women want, you’ve probably noted some areas in which you excel and others you could work on. Maybe you’re a smart, sociable guy with a great sense of humor, but you could use some help in the ambition department. Maybe you’re a great-looking guy with expert communication skills, but you’ve yet to find the one thing you’re really passionate about. Here’s the good news: Confidence is the one thing women consistently say they want in a man.
Confidence is king. That means even if you can’t categorize yourself as “the total package,†as long as you feel good about what you have to offer, and as long as you’re comfortable with yourself, you have a shot.
Okay, the list, as much of it as I’ve seen, isn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. But I’m looking at humor, ambition and confidence, and while I understand and don’t deny their appeal, I have to note that not one of them would preclude a spousal abuser, criminal, cheater or, probably, alcoholic. I think I may have missed a few of the numbers in the middle, but where are honesty, emotional health, character/morality/integrity/decency, lovingness, the capacity for intimacy, good fathering potential or, dare I say, sensitivity? Men are often criticized for thinking with their hormones rather than their neurons, but what kind of deep and long-term thought is indicated by these choices? How can honesty or decency or stability not be in the top three?! And while the article extrapolates some of the positive qualities that MAY go into “ambition,” ambition can be defined just as easily by greed, competitiveness, tunnel vision and neglectfulness of one’s family. The author says it’s not about the money, but is that what the respondents were necessarily saying? You know, you get what you ask for… or look for. You can be entertained, supported in a nice lifestyle and mesmerized. But maybe, just maybe, it’s MORE important to not be beaten, not be cheated on, not be abandoned, not be ignored, not be taken advantage of, not be sabotaged in your attempt to raise a healthy child, or not end up with someone you don’t really know or don’t really like. I meet so many women who complain about an ex, or series of exes, who mistreated them. Why does so little learning take place? Is it lack of self-esteem that stopped women from saying something as simple as, “I am looking for someone who treats me well?” I am just so tired of the repetitive shallowness of the whole “dating scene.” Well, I’ll just go brush up on my joke book, try to swindle some money and become a narcissist. I realize that’s a gross exaggeration of what the survey is saying, but I’ll just betcha I’d score better, so to speak.
Very true…I am one of those women that seeks those qualities…ambition is fine…but just someone who is accepting of themselves and who I am, my goals, limitations, and lifestyle and values is what I truly seek. Don’t care if you have a corner office, or drive a BMW. I will work on getting that myself – if in fact it’s that at all important. I guess I am one of the few women who have other standards, which are not tangible assets. Perhaps that’s why I am single. Not willing to settle for less, simply because the exterior shines. I look under the hood of the car, for all the “bells and whistles”. Hopefully there are more women out there that share my perspective.